Homeschooling in a Pandemic

If you find yourself balancing working from home alongside homeschooling, I’m sorry that you find yourself in this demanding situation. As an educator, a speech-language pathologist, and a homeschooling parent, I want you to know it’s going to be okay—at least from the perspective of your child’s education.

I homeschooled my children. I deliberately simplified our lives to allow them ample time to be children. Becoming an adult happens quickly enough. My children were able to choose the subjects and topics that they wanted to learn. We frequented libraries, conducted online research, visited museums, and read vast numbers of books. We explored nature, engaged in countless science experiments, and constructed inspired craft projects. We hiked on the days that were too beautiful to be cooped up inside, and we hunkered down with a good book or a baking project on the stormy or wintry days that kept us indoors. My favorite memories include my children sitting on either side of me, the three of us wholly immersed in a book. Most of their time, though, was theirs.

My daughter entered the public school system in 8th grade, my son in 6th. We were fortunate to have the option of a project-based learning environment that emphasized student choice and community-building in our neighboring school district. My children thrived there. Their education was anything but traditional. But guess what? They are more than okay. They have both graduated from high school. My daughter is in her third year of college. My son has been accepted to college. He has opted for a gap year in place of online classes amidst this current pandemic.

I’ll admit that I couldn’t always keep a positive perspective over their early years. I focused on what didn’t go well on more occasions than I should have, particularly when I felt overwhelmed, worried, or just plain tired. I would have some good days that felt productive and some not so good days that threatened my sense of adequacy. I often lost perspective in the space of our daily struggles.

Currently, all around the globe, our struggles abound.

We can’t control what life throws at us, but we can control our response.

Now is the time to develop exquisite practices. When you practice self-care, negotiating skills, creativity, patience, perspective, and gratitude, you are not only taking care of your personal needs but also modeling these skills to your children.

Here is my advice:
1. Self-care is a fundamental imperative. We must take care of ourselves if we can give anything to others.
2. Negotiate everything—with your boss, with your child’s teacher, with your partner or helpers, and even your children. You are not required to do it all.
3. Practice creativity when you feel there are no options. Think outside of that box, ask friends to brainstorm ideas and solutions with you. Trust. Every problem has a solution.
4. Lower your expectations. Fortunately, fewer activities are garnering for our attention. It’s okay to expect less of ourselves and our children in these times. This new normal won’t last forever. Focus on today. Just this moment. Just this day. What is reasonable to expect of yourself, your partner, and your children at this moment, on this day?

Let’s not add our fears, worries, and anxieties about our child’s future to an already-anxiety-inducing period. All of this— the schools, the timelines, the standards, the curricula, the deadlines— are all human-made.

We made it up.

And we are in the middle (beginning?) of a global pandemic.

Pandemic life is not the life that we are accustomed to. Life is not ‘as-usual.’ It’s essential to practice stepping back, taking a broader, more objective, or peripheral view. We can gain a new, perhaps even healthier perspective— more inner calm and peace. That new perspective will go a long way toward everyone’s health and well-being, which ultimately takes a higher priority than anything else.

Your child will be okay. Love them, care for them. Let them read. Establish boundaries. Engage as a family in activities that allow for deeper engagement and connection with each other. Trust.

Be well.